3 Question Interview With Guthix

3 Question Interview with Guthix

Interviewer: Hello, last time on our show, we interviewed a very powerful god. Today we will interview another powerful god; GUTHIX!

Audience: (Gasps)

Guthix: My life is a pool of liquid camel dung…

Interviewer: Now that you are here, we will interview you. First question, like always, what are your favorite colours

Guthix: I despise all colours equally. I can’t answer that question

Interviewer: Well, you look very green and cyan-y today. Are those your favorite colours?

Guthix: What I look like has nothing to do with my personality. You stink for thinking that way.

Interviewer: Ummm… Okay. Next question, what’s it like being with Zammy and Sara?

Guthix: Oh, it’s horrible. Both are idiotic nitwits who think that the side they are on is the best. Zammy wants to destroy my world, and Sara would let that happen for the power of “good”. The only reason I allow them to live is because I am nice. Not to mention, they left a HUGE imprint on this world.

Interviewer: Er, about this Sara letting the world get destroyed… he recently he has told us that if the world gets too good or evil, you’ll destroy this. I’d like a conformation (Crosses fingers)

Guthix: That is one of the few times that Sara has spoken something that is not nonsense. It is true, if the balance of the world is tweaked, I shall destroy it along with all of the inhabitants and start a new one preferably not allowing other gods to interfere.

Interviewer: Yes, but how can you destroy your creatures… Isn’t that, evil

Guthix: Destruction is not evil. Good can destroy as much as evil. What I might do is for the sake of balance. Besides, I’ll let the most balanced creatures, like snakes, sheep, and tree-huggers live on my new plane. Also the people I destroy will not be dead. Their souls will be but into Icthlarin’s afterlife. Of course, since there will be millions of souls being released at once, Icthlarin won’t be able to get them all before Amascut devours half of them… But I can live with that.

Interviewer: … Guthix… You’re scaring me…

Guthix: I do that sometimes. Next question.

Interviewer: Hey, hey, hey, let ME say “next question.” Next question, what are your favorite accomplishments?

Guthix: I despise all my accomplishments equally, but I shall say what the people of the world think it is. They say that it is because I stopped the God Wars. If I hadn’t then Runescape would be completely obliterated.

Interviewer: But aren’t you apt to obliterate the world.

Guthix: Yes. Doesn’t make much sense, does it?

Interviewer: Okay, that concludes our 3 question interview with Guthix. Goodbye everyone.

Audience: (Applause)