The Skull of Guthix

The Skull of Guthix is a work-in-progress fanfiction written by User:Weaselitachi. It exists in a universe like RuneScape's, with many features similar to those of RuneScape, but with a more logical way of the functions happening. It begins with a narration by the voice of an old man...

Introduction
''"The Skull of Guthix. A great and powerful object, indeed. Long ago, during the great God Wars, Zamorak, a former Mahjarrat General, Saradomin, Zamorak's brother, and their followers battled against the forces of Zaros, god of emptiness and pure evil. Finally, a follower of Saradomin, Robert, was able to steal the Staff of Armadyl from the god of air and light, and gave it to Zamorak. Saradomin and Zamorak held the staff together and killed Zaros. Peace had finally come to all of Gielinor. But it would not last. Zamorak became greedy, lusting for power, and Saradomin became deluded, thinking he deserved the power since his follower stole the staff. They turned on each other. Their followers changed sides, brother pitted against brother, father against child. They chose generals. Zamorak chose Hazeel, and Saradomin, a man named Dionysius. They fought and fought and fought. But they finally made a fatal mistake: they moved the main battle to Taverley. The battle nearly destroyed the land. They woke an ancient spirit from his sleep. From the stone circle in Taverley arose.....Guthix. By that time, the warriors had left for Falador. Guthix rose to the space above Gielinor and surveyed the land. It was in ruin. Guthix became enraged. He became so much so, he demanded that the brothers flee the land, end their battle, and hold influence only through their followers. They each were confined by Guthix to two sides of Gielinor: Zamorak was imprisoned in the Chaos Fortress, Saradomin in the Order Encampment. Guthix knew that his magic doors would hold for only so long, and he knew that Saradominists and Zamorakians would be after him until the doors broke. And so, Guthix went into hiding. He went to a secluded place which no one knows of. His spirit left his body and he sealed himself into the stone circle of Taverley. His body, a lifeless husk then, shrunk into the Skull of Guthix. If one could find the Skull, they could transfer their souls into it and take upon themselves all the powers of Guthix and with them....rule Gielinor. This is a tale of a mage, a ranger, a white knight, an outdoorsman, a vagabond, a slayer, a black knight, and a hunter. This is a tale of how the group helped Gielinor. This is a tale of how they found the skull, and how, by doing so, they found themselves. This...is the Skull of Guthix!"''

The Story
Lumbridge Swamp Caves, Morning

A level 97 and a level 6 were standing in the caves.

"I dare you to go up to that thing on the wall," said the stronger player.

"Umm...OK, then," whispered the clearly nervous noob.

He did so, and a large arm emerged from the wall. The noob ran back to the strong one, screaming.

"Oh, please. These things are easy to kill!" the 97 said.

He ran up to the wall beast. He wasn't wearing his spiked helmet, and the hand grabbed him by the head and tore it from his neck. The blood draining from his neck became a hitsplat with the number 96 on it. The hand made the shape of a hand puppet and set its sights on the noob. He panicked, but suddenly a black hat flew out of nowhere and sliced off the hand, killing the creature. A man wearing gold-trimmed black mage robes with black pants (also gold trimmed) caught the boomerang-like hat and placed it back on his head.

"Might wanna get away before it respawns, yo," the man said.

"Wh-who are you?" the noob asked him.

"Name's Taileh Hawkeye, or Hawkeye, Hawkeye da Vagabond-" Hawkeye was interrupted by another, nearly identical man wearing blue gold-trimmed instead of black, mage bottoms instead of pants, and black hair instead of silver jumping down the rope into the cave.

"Or, you can call him 'Hawkeye, Lord of Long-winded Intros," the other man said. "Come on!" he said, grabbing Hawkeye by the ear and climbing up the rope.

As they emerged, a cowering man with another person comforting him asked, "Are-are they okay?"

The man in blue said, "The stronger guy's staying, but he told the noob he should go on 'a head.'"

Hawkeye stared at him for a long period of time, but shook off the dark comedy. The noob emerged from the caves as well.

"Thanks for saving me," the noob said.

"Don't tank me, yo. Tank him," Hawkeye said, pointing to the man being comforted. "If he hadn'a told me, I wouldn'a been down dere. I was on my way to Poit Sarim aftah killing goblins when he stopped me and said he hoid a scream comin' from da caves."

"I apologize for not coming myself, but I am a candle seller, not a slayer," the man said, straightening up a bit.

"Actually, I'm a driftah, I don't ezzakly go around slaying everyting and its grandmuddah. Dat'd be Litel Gaif, aldough he and I ain't easily confused. I woik in close proximity wit him, dough."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Uhmm.... I believe there was talk of a reward?"

The man hesitated for a moment.

"Erm.. Yes.... Here, a candle for each of you."

Hawkeye and the other man looked at each other, then the candle seller.

"Y-Y-You're joking, right?" they asked in unison.

"My rates are 1k a candle. I'm giving you 1k a piece, and not making you pay! Isn't that a great steal?"

The man in blue robes glared angrily at the candle seller. He pulled back an arm, and threw a punch at the man, stopping an inch away from his nose. The candle seller was not harmed, but passed out.

"Why'd ya do dat again, Weasel?" Hawkeye asked.

"It's the Otovhet way. 'Do what thou wilt to people who tick you off,'" he joked.

"Eh, whatevah. So, Señor Level 6, you gonna be OK, or do ya wannus to escoit you to a safah place?"

He thought for a moment. "If you take me to Uncle Finlay, I should be fine. If he can take on 14 sharks at the same time, he can take on something from those caves easy, right?"

An alien thought entered Weasel Otovhet's head. It was Hawkeye's telepathic communication, a trait common in RuneScapians. '' ' Finlay da Fishin' Tutah on da Riva Lum? ' ''

'' ' Who else but the Fishing Tutor, dude? You know another Finlay? ' ''

"Ahem, alright. We'll take you to Finlay."

The side of the River Lum, a few moments later

"Finlay, your nephew asked us to bring him to you. He was nearly killed by a Wall Beast thanks to some other guy, but luckily Hawkeye here was able to get to him just before," Weasel said to the Fishing tutor.

"Goodness! Gabriel, you must be more careful!" Finlay sighed, then looked at the two near-twin men standing before him. "You saved my nephew from a terrid fate."

Finlay reached for a scroll in a holder in Gabriel's backpack and unfurled it.

"And look at this! You were skulled! Had that thing killed you you would've stayed dead! Saradomin knows how you got skulled, surely you would've died in the Abyss, but still! You have saved him from death, and me from his loss. This deserves a reward. I shall give you each a reward scroll. Read it, and you will receive 6000 fishing and cooking experience, as well as 5k in gold each. I'm afraid I cannot give you more, but 12000 experience and 10k doesn't even begin to compare to how much my nephew means to me."

"I understand. My uncle would have had three heart attacks by now if something like that had happened to me," Weasel said.

"We're gonna hafta bounce, Finlay. We have a few impatient peeps waiting for us. Sayonara!" Hawkeye said as he and Weasel ran off.

Path from Lumbridge to Port Sarim, afternoon

"Tink Ravin, Mudd, and Snae are still dere?" Hawkeye asked Weasel. Weasel thought a moment.

"Ravin has probably left. She can't stand to stay in one place for too long. Snae goes wherever Ravin goes, so they're both gone. The only one patient enough to still be there is Mudd."

"Maybe we should pick up Litel on da way. He's always a laugh, and he ain'a mean drunk, just a funny one."

"He did get married to a wall once after four or five Asgarnian Ales."

Front Yard of Draynor Manor, afternoon

Weasel and Hawkeye walked along the path leading to the front door of the once-stately manor. Some of the trees swiped at them, the wooshing air forming small blue shields reading zero.

"That's really starting to get annoying," Weasel said.

They made it to the door, opened it, and went through. With a loud bang, the giant door shut behind them, creating an echoing slam.

"Dat too," added Hawkeye.

They walked through the halls. They headed up the stairs in the main room, then went up the spiral staircase nearby them. There, they found Professor Oddenstein, Ernest, whom Oddenstein turned into a chicken, a human, and a chicken once more, and Litel Gaif about to go through the portal to the Killerwatt Dimension.

"Yo, Litel!" Hawkeye yelled, causing the aspiring slayer master to jump.

His Neitiznot helmet fell to the ground, bounced off the floor, and flew through the portal.

"Freakin' great. Thanks a lot, Hawkeye. My helm could be anywhere now. Those Killerwatts are tricky. One's probably snatched it by now. Do you know how long it took me to get that? Do you know what I had to kill to get that?"

Weasel closed his eyes for a few seconds, and then they snapped open as he said, "It took three hours, the death of a level 122 troll king, sixteen Ice trolls whose levels were between 120 and 124, and a low levelled person whom you insisted on referring to as 'Fisky Nooblerton.'"

Litel skipped a beat.

"....Lucky guess..."

"Not really. You were bragging about it for days. Remember?"

Hawkeye began to tap his foot. "So, are we gonna stand here and twiddle, or are we gonna get down ta business? Let's go troo da poital already!"

Weasel took the hat from his head and reached far into it, much farther than one would think possible.

"We don't need to go to the Killerwatt Dimension."

He pulled his arm out of the hat, holding a tiny Killerwatt who couldn't see because of the Neitiznot helm he was desperately trying to wear. Weasel put his hat down and pulled the helmet off of the Killerwatt.

"Here," he said, handing it to Litel.

Small sparks flew from the Killerwatt's eyes; it appeared to be crying. Weasel pulled a small piece of metal out of his hat and, using runes from his pack, fashioned it into a tiny Neitiznot helmet for the creature. It jumped for joy and then jumped through the portal. Weasel put his hat back on his head.

"Dat coitainly was much ado about nuttin."

Litel sighed. "So, why are you guys here? You need something?" he asked.

"We were just wondering if you wanted to come have a drink with us at the Rusty Anchor," Weasel said.

"Sure, let's go."

The Rusty Anchor Pub, late afternoon

A tall, tan-skinned man in white platebody and platelegs sat, asleep, in a chair in the Rusty Anchor. Weasel, Hawkeye, and Litel approached him, trying to ease him awake.

"Five more minutes, momma," he muttered.

"Mudd, it's me, Weasel. We're late, but we're here...."

Mudd shifted, but didn't respond.

"WAKE UP!" Litel yelled.

"Peaches and cream, Miss Daisy!" Mudd gasped as he awoke. "I was having a wonderful dream. Only Litel was there."

Weasel and Hawkeye began cracking up, but Litel was visibly angry.

"Hey, Morty! We'll have six beers and a couple of Black Skulls!"

Weasel walked up to the bar, his chair following him.

"Here's what I owe you for the beers and the Black Skulls, plus a tip and most of my tab." He handed the bartender 90 coins. Morty put the beers on the counter. His chair fell apart, then reassembled itself as a stool. Weasel placed the drinks on the stool and it walked back to the table.

"Drink up, gentlemen. It's not night yet, but I plan on staggering out of here and back home before midnight."

Litel, Mudd, and Hawkeye picked up their beers and Weasel his Black Skull.

"Bottoms up!"

The Rusty Anchor Pub, late at night

"Whelll...." Weasel managed to slur, "Ih'm onna gho hohme, now. Ah can't fheel my leg. Ah needa lai downn."

He began to wobble and then fell down. Mudd blinked a few times, his vision slightly blurred. He picked up Weasel and slung him over his shoulder.

"Come on, Wuh..Wee..Weasel, you've jot..goat..gotta go home."

Mudd began to stagger out the door, heading towards the Rimmington house portal. He reached the portal and, after finally managing to scrawl his name onto the house portal's house directory, he walked into the portal. He went to his portal chamber and stepped into his Yanille portal.

Watchtower, late at night

Mudd trudged out of the Watchtower and around to the shortcut into Yanille. When he arrived on the other side of the rather large wall, he wrote Weasel's name on the directory of the house portal and tossed him into the house portal. He then teleported to Lumbridge and walked back to Rimmington.

The home of Weasel Otovhet, midnight

There was a lot of hustle and bustle at Weasel's home. Even the house itself was stirring. The stone house somehow appeared to sag, as if it was afraid that Weasel wasn't okay. A tree in the yard uprooted itself and walked to Weasel, poking him with one of its branches. He muttered something incomprehensible. The house and the tree seemed to sigh. The tree raised the unconscious mage into its branches and moved back to the door. A chair was waiting at the door. The tree placed the wizard on the chair and then replanted itself in the front yard. The chair walked to the stairs, where an empty suit of armor tossed him to another suit at the top of the stairs. The chair went back to the living room, and the suit on the ground floor moved itself back into its former position beside the staircase. The second suit carried him to his bed and returned to its position. The bed tucked in Weasel as the larder in the kitchen began preparing Weasel's cure for a hangover.

The home of Weasel Otovhet, morning

Morning had broken, and the house made it perfectly clear to Weasel that it had. The curtains drew themselves open and the preening mirror positioned itself just the right angle to position the sun's light directly into Weasel's eyes.

"Graagh... House, I'm awake, I'm awake, already!" Weasel grumbled at his house.

He slumped out of bed, a hand placed on his head. He groaned. He had a terrible hangover that morning, as the house had predicted. He sluggishly walked down the staircase, trying to keep his balance. Weasel plopped down into a chair in the kitchen and grabbed the bucket on the table containing the hangover cure, which he hastily gulped down. He stood up and reached into the larder, removing an egg, a pot of flour, and two buckets of milk. He sat the milk and the flour on the table and pulled a bowl from the shelves. Using the ingredients he'd gathered, he made a bowl of eggs and a loaf of bread and ate them with the bucket of milk. After having his breakfast, he walked back to his room and uttered a spell in an indeterminable language. The wardrobe in the room flew open and Weasel's wizard set flew out.

Player-like Characters

 * Name: Weasel Otovhet, the mage
 * Species: Human
 * Status: Alive
 * Affiliation: Guthixian
 * User(s) of Origin: Weaselreturn, Weaselitachi


 * Name: Ravin Clawn, the ranger
 * Species: Human
 * Status: Alive
 * Affiliation: Guthixian
 * User(s) of Origin: Ravenclaw919


 * Name: Muddrow Fortes, the white knight
 * Species: Human
 * Status: Alive
 * Affiliation: Saradominist
 * User(s) of Origin: Mudd 40


 * Name: Drego Flarew, the survival expert (No, not that one.)
 * Species: Human
 * Status: Alive
 * Affiliation: Saradominist
 * User(s) of Origin: Xxdregoxx, Dragenflare1


 * Name: Taileh Hawkeye, the vagabond
 * Species: Human
 * Status: Alive
 * Affiliation: Guthixian
 * User(s) of Origin: Hawkeye70 0


 * Name: Litel Gaif, the slayer
 * Species: Human
 * Status: Alive
 * Affiliation: Saradominist
 * User(s) of Origin: Littleguy519


 * Name: Snaethan Klord, the black knight
 * Species: Human
 * Status: Alive
 * Affiliation: Saradominist
 * User(s) of Origin: Snakelord253


 * Name: Kazmi Mora Raldo, the hunter
 * Species: Human
 * Status: Alive
 * Affiliation: Zamorakian
 * User(s) of Origin: None

NPC-like Characters

 * Name: The Wise Old Man
 * Species: Immortal Human
 * Status: Alive
 * Affiliation: Saradominist
 * NPC(s) of Origin: Dionysius/Wise Old Man
 * Location: Draynor Village
 * ScapeRune Equivalent: Not shown


 * Name: Hazeel
 * Species: Mahjarrat
 * Status: Alive
 * Affiliation: Zamorakian
 * NPC(s) of Origin: Hazeel
 * Location:
 * ScapeRune Equivalent: Not shown


 * Name: Trimlock
 * Species: Spirit Tree
 * Status: Alive
 * Affiliation: Guthixian
 * NPC(s) of Origin: The main Spirit Tree
 * Location: Tree Stronghold
 * ScapeRune Equivalent: Not shown


 * Name: Demitri
 * Species: Imp
 * Status: Alive
 * Affiliation: First not said and assumed Zamorak, but revealed as Guthixian
 * NPC(s) of Origin: Imp (Impling Defender at the end)
 * Location: Just about everywhere Weasel's group goes
 * ScapeRune Equivalent: Not shown


 * Name:
 * Species:
 * Status:
 * Affiliation:
 * NPC(s) of Origin:
 * Location:
 * ScapeRune Equivalent:

Locations
The Skull of Guthix takes place on Gielinor, named after the planet on which RuneScape takes place. It is very much the same place. However, instead of Gielinor and RuneScape being the same place, RuneScape is referred to as one side of Gielinor. Also, ScapeRune is the other side of Gielinor instead of another universe.

RuneScape
The side of Gielinor that the Skull of Guthix takes place on is RuneScape. The lower three-quarters is, as in RuneScape 2, a place where players (the player-based characters, at least) are unable to attack each other, although it is not spoken of why (Weasel suspects this is the doing of Guthix).

 Cities: 

Lumbridge is the first location involving the heroes that is shown. Lumbridge, like the one in game, is the respawn place of many people. The Lumbridge Swamp Caves, in particular, was the location of the scene at the beginning.